Tuesday, June 6

You'll Never Walk Alone

When you walk, trough the storm, hold your head up high. And don't be afraid of the dark. At the end of the strom, there's a golden sky and a sweet silver song. Walk on through the wind, walk on through the rain. Walk on with hope in your heart.

This song has been inspiring me throughout everything that has been going trough my life. First, about Star leaving to go to the states. That day has been very gloomy. I felt I was really alone. I had no one to share my hurt, my feelings and everything. I just felt sooo lonely. I have a hard time keeping everything to myself. Well, I've been through that for the past 12 years before I met Star. Now, I'm just adjusting to my old lifestyle. She's been gone already for the past 4 days and I already miss her so much. This has been pretty much one of the reasons I haven't gone online. I'm still so depressed and my feelings are just running wild. Hearing stories from friends about their sobbing love lives and how they cope and try to live as normal as they can, I am inspired to do the same.

And second, the start of classes tomorrow. Am I sure that I'm ready to meet back with my classmates and continue studying? After what I have been going through, will I be able to be as efficient as I have done before? Am I really ready to face my biggest past alone. Having no one to share my feelings, am I really ready to face them alone?

I'm back to the cage that I'm in again. After somewhat years of being free and happy to live, I'm back to where I've been in the start. Well it's something to be used to again. My feelings just kept to myself again and there's no one to share it with. There's not another Star that is just the trust-worthy to keep my secrets and feelings with. I may not tell all my feelings here, I'll still find a way to release all my anger and depression.

Everyday, when I wake up, I will just think that Star is always beside me, lending an ear and saying the things that I should do to go back to normal. Hey. I know I am not alone. And I don't intend to. There's still someone out there ready to listen and give me advice and that is... God.